Today I’m going to step a little out of my comfort zone. Okay, a lot out of my comfort zone. I figure … why not? I’ve been out of my immediate comfort zone for several weeks. So …
Fourteen years ago my seventeen year old daughter died in an auto accident. Many online friends already know that but what many don’t know is that she died on a Tuesday, we buried her three days later on Friday and when we arrived home from the cemetery … my husband of twenty-one years informed me (and our boys) that when we moved from our home of 20 years the following week, he wasn’t coming. Even though we didn’t know where we were going to live … he knew where he was going. He already had another home all step up. (I need to say that in hindsight, leaving was the best thing the wasband ever did for me)
Those three events left me with a few issues. The biggest issue: I’m a bit agoraphobic. I like to be home. I’m perfectly happy not going anywhere unless of course it’s with NY. I can just about go anywhere with him but not alone. Including the market. I’d rather fast. I’ve come a long way and I have NY to thank for it. Nevertheless, I still have issues even running errands which we’ve done all day long every single day for almost 2 weeks.
How about you? Have you experienced any life changing events that have left you a bit wiggy?
Smellyann says
I’m sorry for your loss and the subsequent hurts you’ve experienced.
Our son died; he was three days old and an identical twin to our surviving son, Jack, now almost nine. That really threw me a curveball, and I lost it for a long time. My mom died when I was 7, too, and I’ve yet to get over that. Therapy!
Stacy Uncorked says
Oh Cathy! I didn’t know about your hubby’s abandonment! That sucks – especially on the heels of such a tragedy of losing your daughter. ((HUGZ!!))
The Case of the Missing Phone
Auntie E says
Life can be so hurtful and we all need to work on changes. I do not do well with Changes. I also Love to stay home and lately have been bad about going out by myself. Settling back in to that Hermit mode.
Since the lost of my Mother it has been getting worst.
I need to work on getting back out there.
Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell says
I’ve never experienced that kind of thing, and my heart just goes out to you because you did. I’m so glad you’re in a place now with someone who is so secure and loving. I wish I had known you then so that I could have supported you. ((hugs))
Debra @ A Frugal Friend says
Oh sweet Cathi……I’m so thankful that you’ve shared these hurts with me before. And I do think blogging about it can be very therapeutic. It helps to know that others out there have experienced those curveballs in life too….you aren’t alone.
You know the curveballs I’ve been thrown, and yes, they’ve thrown me for a loop and then some. While I’ll never be the same, sharing with friends like you has helped me so much. Thank you for being a great friend. Thank you for sharing your pain…..it takes strength to do that. Hugs!!
JamericanSpice says
I remember about your daughter and I’m very sorry about what your then husband did. I can’t even imagine it.
*HUGS*
You have come a long way and it also reminds me how people and life can affect us.
Because of things that have happened to me as a child, I don’t ever feel comfortable around men. So here at home, I’d rather they not come into my house to fix anything. I’ll walk around with the gun in my pocket.
Deborah says
Yes, I’m a bit like you I would rather stay home.
Marie says
I’m so sorry — hugs!!!
As far as your questions, I had a pretty awful childhood which has left me a bit “strange” about some things — I prefer to be home myself and when I’m having one of those “days” I can get very panicky being away from home. If I have DH or the kids with me I’m usually fine but if I’m on my own, I’d rather be home where I feel safe!
Visiting from Aloha Friday